| Conveyance (click pics for bigger image): |
Paper Bag Rating* |
| Fiat : Qubo |
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The Qubo is described by Fiat as a "Free Space" vehicle. This obviously refers to the void between the ears of the intended buyers. This particular design was conceived on a second-hand etch-a-sketch then hewn from a block of solid tofu by a nervous giraffe called Susan. |
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| Mitsubishi : Colt CZC |
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We'd like to tell you that the czc is a triumph of style over substance.
However as any school kid will tell you, zero divided by anything is zero so clearly it is not. |
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| Renault : Laguna |
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Some people are born with a Laguna, some people have a Laguna thrust upon them, but if you achieve anything in life it's likely you won't want a Laguna. |
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| Honda : CRV |
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Minor crashes in supermarket car parks are increasingly a fact of life and it can be embarassing when you arrive back home and the neighbours see
your dented new 4x4. However Honda have come to the rescue with the new CR-V; cunningly this car looks like it has already suffered a nasty front end shunt. OK, so the neighbours will get a bit of a shock when you first buy it, but thereafter, even having had a number of other bodywork
'incidents', they will not suspect a thing. Brilliant. |
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| Vauxhall : Victor (1950s) |
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It seems retro is the new vogue - what with Mini, Beetle and Fiat 500 all making a comeback. By
contrast, a 21st Century Victor is definitely not going to happen. |
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| Chrysler : Crossfire |
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"Those look fantastic" said an iguana I recently saw walking down the slipway in Kingsbridge,
Devon carrying some deep sea diving apparatus and a tortilla. |
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| Chevrolet : Matiz |
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Having failed to make these pages with the mk1 Matiz, a number of external changes were
essential to gain a listing for the mk2. |
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| Honda : Civic Hybrid |
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If you think that when you buy a small car with a boot, it's still a small car, then the Civic
hybrid saloon is for you. Honda simply took a standard Civic hatch, added a 20bhp electric
motor, battery, some chrome and a boot to make it heavier, and sold it to the Americans (and
a few Brits). |
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| Skoda : Fabia saloon |
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Being the product of a poorly attended Eastbourne focus group, the fabia saloon was not
designed as such, more it "came into being to fulfill a market segment". However it certainly
ticks a lot of boxes, especially if you don't really need a car in the first place. |
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| Reliant : Scimitar SS |
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The scimitar SS is not so much a car as a lifestyle statement; it basically says "I'm mad, and I
don't care". |
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